Title: Sins of the Father
Author: Saydria Wolfe
Fandom: NCIS with background Numb3rs
Characters: Tony, Abby, Gibbs
Word Count: 603
Warning: No beta
Notes: 1.) LDSK = Long Distance Serial Killer. 2.) This is about Tony’s “daughter.” Please note I have never seen and am not interested in seeing the episode where she is met.
Summary: A different take on Tony’s “daughter”
“Of course she’s yours, she has your eyes!”
Tony doesn’t even try not to sigh. “You’d think I would be evidence that I am not the only sperm donor in my family that can make a kid with green eyes!” Abby opens her mouth to argue but he cuts her off. “You’re also forgetting that weekend we had together in Palm Springs? About six months after I join NCIS?”
Abby gapes at him for a moment and then her blue eyes go round. “Oh! That Self-Love Weekend we took. You’re right!” Abby turns to get Gibbs. “Tony can’t get hard for a woman. I have empirical evidence. The sample size was large!” McGee makes a face behind Gibbs’ back and Abby huffs at him. “Not me, Timmy! I’m ace! My only loves are Caf-Pows and Science!” Abby’s smirk goes wicked. “That said, I do like to watch and watch I did! Tony takes it in the ass like a cha-”
Tony slaps a hand over her mouth. “I think they get the point.”
“You’re saying she’s not your kid.” Gibbs grumps. “The paperwork says she is.”
“That’s why I’m asking for a paternity test. Abbs can you do it?”
Abigail doesn’t grace that with a response. He should know better than to doubt the magic of her babies. She’ll get this and any other necessary test done faster than they’ve ever been done! She just turns to her babies and starts preparing the samples he already provided. “So, how’s Ian? It is still Ian, right?”
“It’s always been Ian.” Tony rolls his eyes and follows her lead, turning to face the workstation, ignoring the audience. “It looks like it’s going to always be Ian. I think he wants to tattoo his name on my forehead or something but we’ve compromised and are talking marriage.”
“Oh! That’s so exciting! I haven’t seen him in forever, where is he?”
“He’s in LA working a case with his buddy Don.”
“On that LDSK terrorizing LA?”
“Yeah, that one. I have a bet with myself that it’s more than one but I’m not allowed to help on Don’s cases because he’s an ass about it. So, you know.”
“You can’t just let people die, Tony!”
“I’m not! It’s a hunch. With no evidence to back it up, it has no value.”
“You should like drop him a hint or something.” She grumps.
Tony scoffs. “It’s like you’ve forgotten who I am.”
“Well maybe I have!” She declares punching a few buttons. “We haven’t done,” She stops and blinks. The pause continues. A little more and then! “Tony! We haven’t done lunch together in eight years! And our ace dates! We haven’t gone bowling or to the movies or anything in even longer! Oh my god! Is this my fault? This is my fault, isn’t it? I started doing those things with Ziva and -oh, my god! I was about to bully you into taking my friend’s kid but it’s you! You are my friend! Not that Ziva wasn’t but you, Tony! You came first and you’re still here after I abandoned you! Oh, my-”
“Abbs!” Gibbs barks, stopping the flail-a-thon in its tracks. “You got something there or not?”
“Oh! Right, Gibbs!” Abby stomps back over to her work station, clicks around for a few moments and freezes. “I have to go with ‘not’ here Gibbs.”
“What?” They all ask together.
“Not, I have to go with not. Tony is not a paternal match for little Miss Tali.”
“Am I right?” Tony swallows nervously. “Is she my sister?”
Abbs gives him the wide, shocked eyes.
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